2 days off = Bad Timing for 2

Well, today was "interesting" to say the least.

I think we got about 5-10 minutes of really super good riding in out of 60... which is decent considering I didn't have a lesson today AND it was coming off of 2 days off in a row for both of us.

Starting to understand what it takes to get the Moe to go soft... and it involves me letting go completely and just breathing... and keeping my leg on him.  That leg, buddy... oh, and the outside rein.   I'm finally getting my heels to stay in the correct position for about 30% of the time.  Seems like as soon as I start focusing only on that part of my riding, the rest of me goes by muscle memory and it seems to work... but the minute I start thinking "oh, I need to shorten this rein" or "oh, I need to put my weight in this stirrup" the whole thing goes to hell and Moe's head goes straight up in the air.

But then, what I think is right may not be right.  And when I ask, I start getting nervous/anxiety and then it's stiff Roe & stiff Moe.  Not good.

*sigh*  it's so frustrating sometimes.

Here we go...

So, another lesson today.

Seems like every time we go through it, we find something new to nit-pick.  First, it was my hands.  Then it was my wrists.  Then my heels... now it's my knees.  It's like dressage is nothing but nit picking everything to shreds until you're either hitting a wall or crying into your wine later that evening.  Or, doing it right... but that seems like it's never gonna happen.

*sigh*  At least I got Moe going today and didn't completely f*ck everything up all to hell.  Would actually consider today a "good" lesson, even though I felt like a fool.  Got so much to practice.  Don't know how I'm ever gonna put it all together.

Did you know, posting is more like humping than standing up?  Apparently, I'm rather pneumatic.

Long time, no pajama.

So yeah.  It's been a while.  Like a month since my last post - and while I'm NOT gonna jump up and down screaming "omigod, we're SO amazing!"... well... I'll just leave it at that.  Good part is, we're communicating more consistently.  We are.  Even when I'm out there and it's just me an ol' Moe, we're making it work.  It takes us about 30 minutes to actually get down to business - me relaxing enough to "feel him" and him getting used to me being heavy handed... but after our personal little meltdowns, we're getting about 30 minutes (out of 60) of actual, GOOD work together.

Its stupid and I can't figure out why it takes me so damn long to "get it."  Here's the simplistic formula:  Relax elbows, open chest, and set your leg on (instead of thumping him repeatedly), and the reward is that he rounds, stops tossing his head, and relaxes.  So, once I do get it... Our trot work is a bagillzillion times better than back in Dec when I first brought him home and he was Mister Giraffe-Neck.  My left side is finally doing some semblance of "work."  I'm cheating somewhat... instead of working my left elbow, I just squeeze my fingers and try to keep my wrists straight... but it seems to do what it's supposed to.  Actually, we track left better than right.  But I'll attribute that to my horrible left side (ie outside rein) when we're tracking right.  Not exactly ready for a dressage test (even a Training level one), but we're making progress.  Baby steps, one minute at a time.  I keep forgetting to ask for someone to take pictures of us... mostly it's because I don't want to bother someone with it.

Had a lesson today, too.  Think I MIGHT be suffering from performance anxiety.  Took me a good 20 minutes to calm down while we were warming up, and then people came out and sat down to watch right when we were starting to work on something new (serpentines - not exactly "new," but sort of when you haven't had to do them with an audience)... then I choked up again.  Ridiculous.  Gonna need more happy pills... *sigh*